Critical spectrum
A was an abstract, artist unknown
B bought it, could be worth a bit one day
C copied it, for a secret commission
D donated it to the gallery, with dedicated plaque
E enthused over it to a junior colleague
F framed it, had to cut it down to fit
G gawped at it, what was it supposed to be anyway?
H hung it in an adjacent room, with the Pollocks
I installed it under a too-high spotlight
J judged it to be of marginal significance
K kicked it, activated the sprinkler alarm
L loved it but daren't let on, what did she know?
M missed it, taking a wrong turn after Mondrian
N nudged it ten degrees but no-one noticed
O ostracised it, didn't go for this modern stuff
P patronised it on the optional guided tour
Q questioned the quality of its basic philosophy
R reviewed it for the Guardian, and tomorrow's chips
S scorned it, a child of six could do better
T touched it to get the total sensory experience
U understood it, knew his wife didn't and never would
V videoed it for the local TV news, it wasn't shown
W wanted it, settled for a postcard from the shop
X-rayed it for underlying subversive texts
Y yodelled at it, was thrown out by security
Z zero-rated it and the exhibition closed.